I am laughing..

     I must say, I think I am a pretty gutsy person in some ways.  Today, not only did I ride on the back of a motorcycle with social worker and pal Nilantha, I had to balance a 2 ft. by 3 ft. white board between us as he manuvered the very messy, holey, wet roads of Badulla with me and the board behind him.  The wind was pulling the board toward his head (yes of course we were both in helmets), I was holding the top of the board with one hand, my purse plastered accross my chest but slipping over the side, another heavy bag over my other shoulder,and holding on the the back of my seat with the other hand.  I was laughing when we finished our ride to the hospital, so wishing you could all see me!  I swear I am feeling younger by the day, I may come home in a crib..I think that was a movie..hmm.    A few days ago, after being asked by one of the bigshot doctors in the system, why I didn't ever wear a Sari to special occasions  and basically suggesting again that I do, I remembered that when I was in Batticaloa, I had bought a cotton Sari to bring home and use for I don't know what.  So today, after getting the white board to the ward, one of the nurses dressed me in the Sari.  It is the first time I ever even had one on and I must say, it felt special.  So I don't know what occasion may come up that I can wear it to other then my last day here, but my friend Laxmi and I shall go looking for material for the blouse which must accompany it.  Of course I have already said it has to have 3/4 sleeves and be longer in the midriff than most women wear it but it's OK, they believe me to be a bit crazy anyway.  Even Nilantha was involved in deciding what color the blouse should be.  I kept saying why can't I wear a black jersey I have and he kept saying, no, it isn't suitable.  Sometimes I can't buck the system.
     Last week and this, I have been involved in the full cycle of a Buddhist death and the rituals and ceremonies that accompany it.  In some ways, many ways it is all similar to JudoChristian traditions post death.  The major difference is that people start coming to the house the day the person dies and lunch, a huge meal of rice and curry is provided by the family from that time until the moment they leave for the cemetary.  Neighbors do bring in some food but mostly the family and extended family provide it.  There is no time when people are encouraged not to be at the home.  In the west we usually have hours of visiting, giving the family private time to eat and be quiet.  This is a group society and pleasing the visitors is what is important.  The other thing is that everything here is still done in the house, probably because funeral parlors don't yet exist here, too costly.  So in the hour before leaving for the cemetary, 6 Buddhist monks came to the house and  talked while the family sat on the floor doing rituals.  The family stays home for a week total following the death and on the 7th day, the family, friends, relatives give alms (dana) to  12 priests (monks) in the form of lunch, candys, fruits, things they need like new robes and begging bowls, soap etc. This is all presented to the monks in chairs  covered in white clothe with low tables covered in white in front of them.  Again, there is a praying ritual with monks talking and the family doing rituals.  Then they serve lunch to an invited group which included all the staff of our psych. unit.  This is similar to Jews sending money for a charity when someone dies.  The staff collected money to present to the family because the costs are great to provide all the cooking, meals etc. to so many guests.  It is believed that doing all of this is giving points in a way to the person who has died and trying to reach Nirvana in some lifetime.
     I know most of you reading this are suffering with huge snow storms or other incliment weather but I just have to complain a little about the huge shift in the weather here in the hill country of Sri Lanka..it's friggin' freezing here right now and hardly ever stops raining.  I am sitting writing to you with 3 layers of clothing, including a polartec, a shawl over that, a wool scarf around my neck and wool socks on my feet.  All of these items I brought and never wore before now.  It feels like a cold, rainy raw day in late fall in NYC..ugh.  OK, OK...