Back from vacation

Well, I've been to Galle and in someways, I'm glad to be back.  2 more days, 6 hours more of language class but on Wednesday I shall finally be off to Badulla.  Galle is an old dutch fort city, surrounded by a wall which kept the Tsunami from devastating everything and killing a lot of people.  It is a charming little town with quaint streets, some so pristine with many colored Borgenvilla and some with garbage being eaten by the local cows and dogs.  The first day, Lieve, a volunteer from Holland and I walked the entire fort area hitting every shop we passed.  I knew Lieve was the right person to spend the day with in this way as she had already accompanied me on several buying trips for my apartment and I know we shop similarly.  Eight of us went to Galle which was probably quite ambitious, eight opinions, eight tastes in food, but we managed mostly and are back safe and sound.  Near Galle is the area where men on poles fish.  The pole is inherited from father to son and is quite prized.  Unfortunately as I was in a tuk tuk to go see them, itstarted to pour with rain and we had to turn back.  I did get to Unawatuna beach for a day which was lovely.  We sat with the native people rather then the expats and visitors so women had to be covered.  Sri Lankan women do not wear bathing suits, they were some kind of cover up or their saris or shalwars and wade in the water.  Fortunately I had something to wear over my suit so no trauma for anyone there.  What was unfortunate however was that as we walked from one end of the beach to another I slipped as a huge wave rolled in and my purse and bag with all my stuff got immersed in the water!  The major issue is that my new camera was totally soaked.  So without going into details, my camera is now very temperamental.  Sometimes it turns on, sometimes not.  sometimes it will zoom, many times not, sometimes the lens cover opens  mostly it opens just partially.  I guess I am going to have to have it fixed, somewhere when I figure out how to get that accomplished.
We did eat while we were in Galle but it would frequently take upwards of an hour to get food.  It would start with first having to get menus, then a waitperson, then waiting for food which could take a very long time, we never figured out why.  This morning at our little hotel I ordered a fruit plate for breakfast others ordered more complicated and time consuming dishes, they had to wait but at the end of an hour they had eaten and I was still waiting for the fruit!  No reason and only smiles from everyone.  I think I have mentioned the Sri Lankans are so wonderfully nice.  Everybody says hello, smiles, talks, it's great.  It's weird because almost everything has to be bargained for which I really don't like but after it's done we are all very friendly.  Galle became my little village.  By the time I left, many shopkeepers knew me and I pretty much was greeted by all these 20 somethings in the local cafe I hung out in.    Oh speaking of fruit, have I said that the fruit here is the best I have ever tasted?  Daily, pinapples, papaya, mangos and bananas, fantastic!  Funnily, the last few days we have eaten odd things, not the usual diet we had gotten used to which is various kinds of curries and rice for lunch and dinner.  (curry is vegetable, chicken, fish in a very hot sauce made with chillies, curry powder or leaves etc.)  Then there is daal and other little things and rice.  Well, I miss my SL food.  Eating it is the first time I can remember all systems working properly (!) and feeling very good.  Tomorrow, back on a routine!  On the  drive back to Colombo our driver stopped at a monument for the thousands of people who were on a train when the Tsunami hit and all died.  It was very moving.  All seems so calm and beautiful there now, hard to believe.  It has been very hot and humid here.  Oh, have I mentioned my new nickname:
The Jewish Buddhist Dwarf!!!

Another Monday

By the label of this can you tell I am eager to go to my posting in Badulla?  Today I was shown pictures of my apartment and I was beside myself with excitement.  It is painted a pale yellow and has 2 bedrooms, one with a double bed and one with a single so there is lot's of room.  There is only a two burner stove so I unfortunately (ahem) will not be able to do a lot of cooking.  I did buy a deep frying pan that I can cook many things in so that should be ok.  Anyway, the living room has these lovely large glass windows and look out at trees and flowers and the mountains, very beautiful.  I move on Dec. 30 and Dec 31 is the first holiday!  It is a Poya day which is the full moon holiday every month.  My first day of work is Jan. 1 but since that is sort of a holiday, the Social worker from the hospital is going to pick me up to go meet the staff and join them for some kind of celebration but no work!  My first real day of work shall  be January 4 which is, I think, when Ancy returns from her vacation and I finally get to meet her.
I had an eye problem the other day and being afraid in a country I don't know well to ignore it, I went to the doctor.  It is a very interesting system.  First the secretary at VSO called the doctor to make the app't.  He suggested seeing the eye specialist and I thought made an appointment for 2:30pm.  I was told to go a bit early to meet our doc. and talk about my medication needs.  So I got there and they called the doctor and he is lovely and we chatted about this and that and then he said, do you want to see the eye doctor and I said I thought I had an appointment for 2:30 and he said no, VSO was supposed to send the money over so I couldn't make the appointment.  So I paid the money and got an appointment but by now I am about #7 and the doctor it turns out hadn't arrived yet because something happened to his car.  So I suggest I go back to my guest house and get my medication for the GP to see what I am on and if he is able to order it (I shall talk about all this stuff another time!).  So he said to go get my meds and come back at 3pm when it is time for the eye doctor so I go home and come back, getting lot's of walking in and the eye doctor is not in yet; so I see the GP again and then because he is sitting with me which  he sees as his job, I suggest I go around the corner to my Barista place and have coffee.  He takes down my cell phone and will call me when he get's word that the doctor has arrived.  Meanwhile the GP has not decided if he will charge VSO for my visit because I have yet to see the eye doctor!  So, I go and order coffee, drink a mouthful and of course my cell phone goes off, the doctor has arrived.  I run back to the hospital and have to now first pay for the GP and hospital costs.  Then I am taken to some other section of the hospital where I am seen pretty quickly by the doctor.  He says I have Uveitis and is wondering about various chronic illnesses which I fortunately don't have.  So he puts me on steroids for the eye and antibiotics for the eye and tells me I need to see him again on Wednesday morning.  I say good because then I am going to Galle and the beach and he says no going in the water for 2 weeks and I had a temper tantrum...just kidding.  Anyway, he gave me 2 prescriptions and I go out to make an appointment for the next visit which is at some other hospital, far away from this one.  In order to make the appointment, I have to pay!    Then I go to the hospital pharmacy to get the eye drops and they don't carry them.  I am told to go the a pharmacy somewhere else in the city.  I then leave the clinic area and get totally lost and come out someplace I was totally unfamiliar with.  I walked for a long time, found a trishaw (tuk,tuk) bargained for the price which is a necessity here but difficult since I had no idea where the pharmacy was and go off...I shall stop boring you with all this but I was so proud that In a matter of about 3 or so hours I actually was back at the guest house with everything I needed!  The cost of all this including 2 different doctors, hospital charges, medications, tuk tuk ride to and fro and my next doctor's visit, a grand total of under $45.
Have I talked about the trishaws, buses, taxis?  Have I talked about the language lessons?  Have I talked about the upcoming elections? or the weather or the shopping or how I have to prepare the drinking water or...well I shall save it all for future blogs.  I don't want you to be bored or for me to run out of things to say

more..

After my last blog I decided to write down what I want to make sure to talk about because I invariably forget a lot and new stuff happens like today. We were driven to our afternoon class to the International Peace Council  for Sri Lanka where we had a talk about their work and the political history of Sri Lanka.  I guess I naively thought that since it was a Buddhist country it would be more peaceable then other places.  Sri Lanka is actually a pretty warring  nation. I temporarily forgot Northern Ireland, the Crusades, Bosnia, you know what I mean, ethnicity seems so strong, more then religion and yet sometimes justified by religion.  Anyway that is not what I wanted to talk about but I do need to say that I just a few days ago, found out the most horrible news which is that in Uganda it is now the law that you will be put to death for being homosexual!   The law stating that if you purposely spread AIDS you will be put to death was defeated!
Let me talk about some very happy things.  For Christmas 8 of us volunteers are going down to Galle and to the beach.   We are staying in a place called the Frangipani Hotel.  It sounds dreamy and it is in the old Dutch section of Galle.  We are leaving next Tuesday until the 27th.  We decided we shall have Secret Santa since we shall be there on Christmas which is big here at least in terms of decorations.  The  Lankans celebrate all holidays I've been told!  This fact is why they have about 25 holidays off a year.  I get 15 of those thru VSO plus however many my employer gives off plus 20 work days off for vacation a year!  So I am off a minimum of 35 days a year!  Start putting bids in for travel folks, you to me, me to you, India, Maldives whatever, that's a lot of time to play!
Have I mentioned the dogs who travel in packs here?  It is a little scary but I we stay clear and feel very reassured that we got our 3 rabies shots despite the $1000 it cost for them (no I didn't have to pay).
I am making the equivalent of $10 a day which so far is fine and we get an allowance to buy things for the flat we get.  Of course having little else to see in Colombo I am on a search for the right sheets, towels, dishes, pots, pans and lovely things to decorate my home.  I am determined to pretty much hit every important shop so no stone is left unturned to get the best value, price and beauty.  I already bought some lovely placemats which I fell in love with which then led to a sale of white dishes to go with them..not so important you say well for me it made sense but then I worried about what color the flat was and what if I buy the wrong color so I researched (questioned anyone who might know) and found out my walls are pale yellow so now I have a better sense...I know you are laughing about this.  What is funny is that one of my language teachers took me round last night to look at things in a couple of shops and a craft show.  We had very little time because she arrived SL time as they say (very late I say) and so I looked quickly everywhere thinking we were in a rush and I would come back.  She meanwhile shopped, bought stuff in every store and chastised me for not studying each product enough, she does not know who she is dealing with!  Anyway I think this woman is great, her ancestry is Buddhist, her parents became Christian and she has become a Jehovah's Witness.  I am looking for Buddhists and so far I have been out with a JW and Friday I am going out with a Catholic Priest!  Oy...

How to tell you everything...

How to even begin this one.  I feel I have been here for so long in some ways. I still am not sleeping much but am getting used to it.  I want to talk about everything, our training, the language, the people what I have done here, how it feels.  I shall try...
I should begin by saying AAIBOOWAN (may you have long life in Sinhala) or VARERKKERM (Tamil).  So yes 2 languages, lots of problems in so many ways.  Let me start by saying I have not met an unpleasant Sri Lankan so far.  People have been so nice to us, cab drivers, tuk-tuk drivers, people on the street, soldiers, everyone.  However, there continues to be a lot of strife here.  Lot's of fighting between the Sinhala people (Sinhalese is anglicized) and the North and East Tamils.  It is national issues, it's religious issues, S. people tend to be Buddhist, T. people tend to be Hindu, then there are Muslims and Christians. There have been wars going on here in different parts of the country for 20 plus years and it really isn't over.  Each part of the country seems to have problems with other parts, men with women, lots of alcoholism, lot's of domestic violence which is of course denied since it is mostly Buddhist, lot's of suicide, Post Traumatic Stress due to torture of citizens and disappearances of people just like that, it is very complicated.  There is no one person or group to blame this on, all are guilty and innocent, all are torturers and tortured.  After the Tsunami things were better between all for about 2 weeks, then the south felt the east.... or the west thought the north... The issues are deep and imbedded.
So were do I fit in?  Take all the mental health issues related to what I just wrote about, add to that Schizophrenia, Bipolar disorder, Dementia etc. and the lack of knowledge or acceptance of the idea of Mental problems..
Then there are the added cultural issues:  on the books there are good laws against rape or child sexual abuse or trafficking  but if you are raised to believe that it is shameful to talk about such things then who is going to go to the police and if you do go and they tell you to go home and work it out with the abuser, what do you do?  So for me I see how little I really know, how sheltered I have been coming from the world I do, how privileged we are in the west..I don't know if there is anything much I can do other then listening and supporting and being as patient as is needed.
Last night we were invited for a going away drink for one of the VSO volunteers at the fanciest hotel, the Galle Face Hotel.  It is literally built on the Indian Ocean front and is just lovely.  It was the first chance we all had to meet some of the other volunteers who have been here a while.  The volunteers and the staff are so wonderful, a fantastic, dedicated underpaid group of people all around and full of joy and fun.  I feel so privileged  to be part of all this.  It is weird for me actually that the last few nights I have been dreaming of my parents and my partner, people no longer available to me in life, the setting is usually NYC in some weird way.  I take it as positive but have no idea what it means.
I haven't mentioned that I come about every other day to a local coffee bar to use there wifi.  I feel they are my local friends, they greet me warmly when I enter and even though I usually only buy water which is very cheap they never seem to expect more or resent my sitting here for hours.  The name is Barrista.  Across the street is a much fancier coffee house, more like Starbucks which is called The Coffee Bean and I think is American in origin but I like my little place and my new friends.
I haven't mentioned my best news.  I have talked to the other VSOer in Badulla where I shall be going and I shall have a lovely 2 bedroom apartment there (hint, hint).  I can get a fast internet connection and there is an electric plug to put in a hot water heater in the bathroom if I choose!!!! (electric is pretty expensive here but  what the..).  The staff is pretty excited that I am coming soon and think it is hysterical that we shall be Nancy and Ancy (the other volunteer).  Sorry this is so long but a lot happens here...

In Country Training and life

Well, I have wanted to write for what seems like many days but to my total surprise I have been too tired to walk to the internet cafe (a ten minute walk) on most days.  I have always arrived places and went sight seeing almost immediately, now I am not yet sleeping and dragging myself thru our training each day.  It is somewhat hot and humid but not overly so, I keep myself up until at least 9 or 10 but still..oh well it will work itself out.  I am using this of course as an excuse as to why I cannot seem to remember anything we are learning in our daily 3 hour Sinhala language class.  I am having a lot of fun with our teachers though who have wonderful senses of humor and love to play. Learning the culture of the Lankans is great, their language is practical and without extra words, a lot is said with facial expression and they are direct yet secretive.  The best thing about them is how much they smile and laugh and seem to take joy in the moment despite all the horror that has happened here like wars, tsunamis, poverty etc.   I am in training with 5 other people, one dutch, one American of Bangladeshi origins, one Ugandan and 3 Brits.  half of us are in mental health placements and half in  other things.
 I had to sign something yesterday that referred to me as an expat!  How exciting!  I had to go to buy a new cell phone and went with the other american woman.  In the store the the clerk asked her about herself because she is Bangladeshi and then asked about her mother?  She was referring to me!  So now I must already look Asian.  I am sleeping for the first time with mosquito netting although there don't seem to be many mosquitos, and for someone like me who needs to get out of bed at night (!) frequently, it is quite inconvenient!
I just spoke on the phone with Ancy who is the Psychiatric Social Worker at the placement with me in Badulla, I am overjoyed and excited to meet her and get there.  She will be on vacation when I arrive on Dec. 30 unfortunately and apparently from Dec. 31 until around Jan 4 I shall be pretty alone but it will give me time to explore the town and get my apartment, which has 2 bedrooms by the way (ahhm friends and family) set up.  Okay it is true there is no hot water and the cold water is cold.  It is also rainy season and it is fairly hot and humid.
My daily lessons continue especially to be tolerant and not make judgements and  NOT MAKE ASSUMPTIONS about anything!

Finally!

Hi all, Well after about 11 months in the planning, the 4 lists, the anxiety, the excitement, the parties and the leavings and the tears, the organization, the loss, the love, after everything, I have finally made it to Sri Lanka.  I must admit that as I sat in the airport for hours in Doha, Qatar, I had some fair amount of nervousness and wondered what I was doing.
Everything really went as planned, we were met at the airport (we you say, well it turns out there were 2 other volunteers on the plane, I did meet one of them on the 3rd flight).  We are staying until Dec. 29. at a lovely little guest house run by a woman who is Sri Lankan but has lived all over the world.  I for some reason got the best room I think.  I have a fan in the ceiling, a little balcony outside so I get a little breeze and a trickle of what probably is hot water.  I say it that way not really because I was being impatient but because when we arrived we had 2 and a 1/2 hours until lunch and I laid down for a little nap and woke up thinking I had over an hour and it turned out it was lunch time so I had to jump quickly into the shower and pull stuff out of my neatly packed bags and make a mess because I was keeping everyone waiting..
There are 8 people who will train over the the next 3 weeks.  There are 26 in country all together.  We shall have 3 hours of training 6 days per week in language!  We start tomorrow.  On Dec. 30 I travel to Badulla and find out about my accommodations.  There is another volunteer in Badulla, a psych social worker which is good, less isolating.  Is it significant that that is the anniversary of my mother's death?  If it is it is a sign of her joining with me in this venture I think.
In the meantime, I now have to go back to my room and face the mess I left it in when I tore through trying to find clothes after my luke warm shower when I overslept!!

My last day..

Well, I woke up pretty early, read about Colombo, SL  my first stop for three weeks before going to my placement in Badulla, SL.  Then I looked up whether pens, other then ball point pens leak in flight as my cousin Helene insists they do and, guess what, they can!  Then I wrote my last list which is all phone calls I have yet to make and then I thought, let me figure out a way to get a map of Sri Lanka onto this blog which as you can see I did not succeed in doing but I did figure out how people can post a comment so it should now not be a problem..just click on where it says 0 comments or 1 or whatever and put in your name and write a comment and post!  So it is now 7:04AM and I have accomplished something and I have read a web site from a flight attendant that again reminded me AGAIN to HAVE PATIENCE and HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR..
This reminds me that I waited patiently and with good humor for my favorite meal and last night, the meaning to being a New Englander came to fruition, LOBSTER!!!!

LIFE....

Within about half and hour of my last posting, I got a call from the angel who had agreed to care for my wonderful little puppy, Ms. Elbe.  Elbe had some health issues but seemed to be doing OK.  Well she was no longer doing OK and on Sunday I went down to NYC, picked up my baby and carried her in my arms into the vet and held her while she was "put to sleep".  It was awful and I am so sad as I was for the few days preceding this.   The wonderful joys of the last few weeks, friends, great food, parties, love all over the place and the sadness of having to leave those I love or their leaving me, this is what Life is, all of it.
Friday, December 4 was to be Elbe's 13th birthday!  RIP

My second party!

Friday evening my sister Roberta and other family members gathered together to have a:  she's finally leaving party. Actually, I was fortunate enough to be able to see a lot of my nieces and nephews and their children at a gathering in honor of my leaving to volunteer in a developing country.  This was a group of my generation cousins and their kids and grandkids  and my sister Roberta's kids and grandkids.  This was really a big deal considering we had to all be brought in in wheelbarrows after having stuffed ourselves on the best, old fashioned Thanksgiving dinner  the day before.  The food was fine but the best for me was my favorite dessert, peppermint stick ice cream and dark chocolate hot fudge sauce!  This party sort of launched me into my final week before leaving for Sri Lanka next Saturday.  I have had a real noticeable mood change.  I am feeling sad..I said goodbye to my partner of 20 years who is in a nursing home unaware of who I am, I said goodbye to my stepchildren and grandchildren, I have a dear friend who was hospitalized this week and I am not with him, I am spending time with my cousins and sisters who are close friends to me and who's counsel I shall miss.  Wow, this is real and sad and wonderful and the measure of my abilities is still coming up...this week I prove my worthiness...I no longer can put it off..this week, packing..leave packed or die!

Moving on with the list including the VISA

     So I left NYC the day after my party and came to the suburbs of Boston to visit family.  It happened not out of nobility or a need to see everyone for three weeks before I leave but frankly because I had to vacate my apartment by Nov. 15 to my subtenant!  Having said that, it is the perfect segway between my NYlife and Sri Lanka.  My family of course, are being loving and wonderful to me and so helpful in finishing up my list (actually I'm on list 3!).  Major item on the list was of course obtaining my visa so I can enter Sri Lanka.  This was the place where one is supposed to trust that everyone outside of oneself does their jobs and I end up with a visa before Dec. 5.   This is part of my daily meditation lesson, to focus, bring myself back to the present , not go off to some nightmare place where the plane is leaving and I have no passport with a visa in it..So, this is my daily struggle and in the meantime I called the Sri Lankan embassy, I called the VSO rep (who is wonderful the the way, Gesa), I was a tiny bit pro-active..not to torture you all with all the details, I now have my visa and passport in hand and am ready to leave for SL on Dec. 5 at 5:30pm!

Food..a post of it's own.. plus

Pretty much my oldest friend, Ruthie, Ruth I guess is more grown up, who I went to Nursing school with is now a chef.  She was head of the test kitchen at Gourmet magazine until it closed several weeks ago.  Anyway, Ruth catered my party and I have to say there was probably enough to feed 200 people.  I must share the menu:  Dill Lox sandwiches on marble rye, Red Pepper, White Bean and Arugula (Vegan), Walnut Honey Cream Cheese on Raisin Bread, Pimento Olive Wraps, Turkey with Mustard Butter, Tuna and Pesto sandwiches, Curried Chicken Sandwiches.  Of course there were also cheeses,  fruit and pita chips, Baba Ganoosh, Hummus and Red Pepper Cheese Spread.    Did I forget to mention desserts like Texas Brownies (my personal favorite), Lemon Shortbread Bars, Ginger Chewies and Chockful Blondies.

I need to tell you that my friend Lin who I went to visit on my most extraordinary trip ever, to Kenya, in 1988, went above and beyond in having this party at her home.  Lin is dealing with a terrible tragedy in her life and yet opened her door through her love.

Vying to host were Lee and Lucy old friends who have been my support thru my own tragedies, never abandoning me and sharing this joy with totally open arms.  As I write this blog I am thinking, is this me who is so cared about?  How did this happen....

I'm leaving New York..

From 3 to 9pm about 60 people arrived to celebrate the fact that I am leaving New York and going off on an adventure.  It was quite wonderful.  Around 3:10 when no one had arrived I asked my friends who were making me the party if they ever gave a party that no one  came to.  I actually did once give a party with a roommate that no one came to but not this party.. they came, so many wonderful people who want to  share my excitement and joy at taking my life in a new direction, sharing it with many new people and having a chance to give whatever I can.  I felt so fortunate.  It's strange to me how many people think I'm brave or adventurous or other things.  I just feel I am doing what I always wanted to finally.  It was hard to kiss and hold my wonderful grandkids and say goodbye but sort of great to know of their genuine love for me.  I gave them all a small pendant of the peace sign which I wear too so we would be connected.  Tomorrow I'll be off to Boston for a 3 week transition before leaving on Dec. 5.

www.cuso-vso.org

WHEN I'M 64...NANCY IN SRI LANKA: First CONTRIBUTIONS

First CONTRIBUTIONS

     My first contributions have come in.  People actually have sent money in support of me, this endeavor, CUSO-VSO..It feels wonderful.  It feels like I cannot change it now, I must continue on my mission. These people believe in me and that I am actually going.  This is serious and I feel an enormous commitment to them and to CUSO- VSO.  This is how I felt when I volunteered to walk for 3 days to raise money for Breast Cancer, an enormous sense of devotion to the commitment.
     I haven't figured out how to link yet so here is where you can SEND A CONTRIBUTION IN MY NAME:

CUSO-VSO
44, rue Eccles Street
Ottawa ON  K1R 6S4
+1 613 829 7445  ext. 272
Toll-Free 1 888 434 2876
Fax: +1 613 829 7996
www.cuso-vso.org

Airline tickets

Today I got an email asking if the airline tickets sound ok.  I fly from Boston to NY to Doha to Colombo.  It took me at least 10 minutes to find out where Doha was, it's in Qatar of course!  So I fly via Qatar Airlines leaving on Saturday Dec. 5 and arriving in Sri Lanka on Dec. 7...Of course I don't have a visa yet but I am sure everything will work out.  It usually does.  This is really happening, this is really real.

I'm trying

Each day I get more accomplished in my quest to be ready to leave NYC and the US by Dec. 4.  Friends have come over and directed me in various ways which pushed me toward the next step.  Yesterday I got an email from Gesa at CUSO-VSO talking about my tickets and Visa preparations, now I am excited and sort of believe it is happening.  Each day I try to figure out something else about the blog as well.  I want tabs that have titles where I explain who VSO is and where exactly I shall be living and what  I am going to do and why and.....I haven't figured out how to do that yet but I'm trying.

double oy

OK now I have set up 5 blogs!!!! Blogger kept saying I couldn't have the url title I wanted so I kept trying and apparently each time it set up a blog and now I have 5 and can't delete any of them..why am I doing this in the middle of trying to move for 2 years???

OY..GETTING STARTED

Well I am attempting to set up my own blog, pretty exciting right? It took about a million tries to get an address, I think because I tried to get what I wanted over and over and it started rejecting addresses it had previously accepted! Sounds like me somehow..